| still keeping the lj, but.... |
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| 11:17am 24/04/2009 |
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madmarya.blogspot.com
madmarya.blogspot.com
madmarya.blogspot.com
madmarya.blogspot.com
madmarya.blogspot.com
madmarya.blogspot.com
madmarya.blogspot.com |
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(Slit My Wrist) |
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| 12:24pm 06/04/2009 |
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people should always post happy, awesome things about me in their journals. |
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(Slit My Wrist) |
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| 10:33am 25/03/2009 |
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i'm the evil one who said: i'm gonna let everything just happen. |
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(Slit My Wrist) |
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| times i should have gone to the hospital and didn't... |
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| 10:24am 24/03/2009 |
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-when i had food poisoning so badly that i was throwing up blood and couldn't move my legs
-when i crushed my finger under a 50 pound industrial window and ripped all my skin off getting my finger out from under it
-when i fell down our front steps in 7th grade
-when my ear was exploding on itself with infection freshman year of college
-when my ear was ripped in the first place at the throwdown show
-when i had mono at college
-when i got kicked in the face during cheerleading practice in high school (possibly had a broken nose and never got it checked out...might explain all of my sinus problems since then)
-various black eyes and possibly fractured limbs from shows
-when i dislocated both of my hips after a bad vault when i was a gymnast. that injury is why i had to quit. and my right leg is turned weird because of it and pops out of the socket on it's own sometimes. |
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(Slit My Wrist) |
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| ok, let's do this. |
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| 09:48am 18/03/2009 |
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Step 1: Get your playlist together, put it on random, and play
Step 2: Pick your favorite lines from the first 25 songs that play
Step 3: You guys gotta guess the song.
1. I want, I say, I do. Everybody dance now.
2. Walk close to the fence, feel it hit your clothes.
3. And what's more, they were boys with their cars, summer jobs, oh my god.
4. Daddy said you gotta show the world the thunder.
5. If a man's hands show his trade does it suit me then?
6. I'm sorry I know that's a strange way to tell you that I know we belong.
7. His glasses, the way he writes in purple pen...
8. All my friends are murder, and all my bones no marrow's in.
9. It's the one that stole your father's pride, that mighty mighty dollar sign.
10. I live in notes and photographs.
11. She will love you through your demise.
12. But does anyone notice there's a corpse in this bed?
13. I'd be chatting on the interweb...
14. Does her mother smoke? Or does she jog every morning? Does she drink when she thinks about me, or doesn't she need to drink?
15. So you say you like my shirt (I like your shirt). And you say you've got a lot just like them (I've got a lot just like them). And I hear you wrote a song about me (La la la la). By definition a crush must hurt, and they do. Just like the one I have on you.
16. Who's the real sucker? When they create you and then hate you for surviving. No thanks to all the fair weather motherfuckers.
17. Why can't we talk again? Oh, why can't we talk again?
18. If it ain't your love...I want blood from you.
19. It's 1 AM, it's 2 AM, it's 4 in the morning. Did I think she'd be here? I fooled myself again. I think I did. I think I fooled myself again.
20. Forever a sleepwalker.
21. Most guys I dated got intimidated so now I date up.
22. I'll wear glass shoes and plastic wrap. No, I'll just wear my insides.
23. We're all searching for something that you're never gonna find if you live in America.
24. So sneakers or flip flops. I'm starting to panic.
25. Every line is plotted and designed to leave you standing on your bedroom window's ledge. |
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(Slit My Wrist) |
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| last night |
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| 12:14pm 13/03/2009 |
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so last night was pretty awesome. i haven't slept at all for the last few nights because of nightmares, and matt was super cranky because of work. somehow we managed to pull it together to go out last night.
the night started at a dinner party. a few friends of anna-lisa's live in boston now as well and had a potluck type dinner. we were late going over, but it was okay. we only stayed for a few hours, ate some delicious pie, and chatted. for a room full of people that didn't know each other, it was surprisingly not that awkward.
we left around 10, and i convinced ann and matt to go with me to felt to see e for explosion play. we had so much fun! there was literally no one there...so we had a run at the bar. the band played an amazing set, and we ended up hanging out with them for another hour or so after they finished up just shooting the shit. it was awesome, and we definitely made some friends and contacts on the west coast. chris, the guitarist, was probably one of the funniest, nicest people i've ever met. him and i exchanged numbers and will definitely stay in contact for sure. the rest of the band was super adorable and nice as well...although jamison was super shy and a bit awkward (why can't i be an h&m model, j? i want free clothes! i want to be dapper too!). he's still pretty dreamy though...and dapper, of course.
they invited us to play a show with them in cali sometime this summer. chris and i will work out details. so pumped! |
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(Slit My Wrist) |
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| adam is amazing... |
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| 04:35pm 12/03/2009 |
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Marya: it's time for something fun now
Adam: do it upp
Adam: throw down
Marya: haha i will fucking throw shit down in the middle of a shoegaze concert...what. in the midst of hipsters with their arms crossed
Adam: haha they will most likely just look at you once, shake their head and look back away
Marya: true. they are too cool to make a scene...or even react
Adam: haha the only scene they need to make is the one they currently are WHAT WHAT
Marya: hahhaahah lamest joke ever! |
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(Slit My Wrist) |
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| miss miss miss |
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| 11:17am 12/03/2009 |
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I miss sophomore year of college so badly right now it's insane. That year will go down in history as one of the best years ever for me...possibly THE best. I want it back. I want to do it all over again.
Highlights of sophomore year at NYU:
- Throwing away all of my clothes and wearing the same pair of jeans and wife beaters every single day. I barely showered, hardly ever wore make up, and just didn't care what anyone thought of me. It was great not having to impress anyone.
- Befriending Suzi and Liz. Liz quickly became my wife, partner in crime, and all around bff at NYU. Suzi was my party time, chill hang outs, spiritual advisor and confidante. We got through a lot and I told her so many secrets.
- Liz M. the sometimes horrible, sometimes amazing roommate. She was going through a depression that year and it was really difficult for both of us being in such close quarters. But in the end, I remember the ridiculous nights watching The O.C. together, going to the market at 3am for ice cream, and talking shit about our professors.
- Patty's spy work on our professors. She found every myspace, friendster, livejournal, etc. account of our music history professor. She then would take his photos and make fun e-cards with them. Awesome.
- My constant boy drama...that wasn't really that dramatic at all. Everyone else thought it was dramatic...I just didn't really care enough to get that worked up on it. LOL Dan and JC. Ambiguously Gay Vegan! Jolly Green Giant!
- Josh and Suzi's always entertaining friendship. I could sit and watch them for hours.
- The INFAMOUS PARTIES: Robert Goulet's Coconut Bangers Ball (held by Josh, of course), scaring freshman and crashing their New Students Mixer and Dance, and the ever-so-famous among my friends - THE HALLOWEEN PARTY IN WHICH I TOOK OFF MY PANTS! yay naked.
- Meeting Ryan, RJ, and Brooks...my boys. I love them.
- The epic Saves the Day show in Brooklyn with Ryan, RJ, Brooks, Liz M., and the Long Island crew.
- The day I wore bright yellow BOOTY SHORTS to our Music History final in December! It was on a dare from Brooks. He asked me to marry him.
- Playing Bad Dudes with the boys, late night Taco Bell (it only tastes good at 3am), and rat city in the park.
- Doing touristy things with Meghan H. Keeping her secrets. Taking naps in her room all the time...AND WATCHING THE SUICIDE GIRLS DVD TOGETHER!!!!! HAHAHAHAH!!! Video vixen photo shoots and other things no one else will ever see.
- Tattoos with Liz M.
- Baking and bike rides with Sara W.
- And last but not least, Bamboozle with Liz M. and Sarah. Sarah came down to New York for it. We ventured to Jersey. We got beat up in pits, started bottle wars, got terrible sun burns, nose bleeds, injuries galore, and what not. We counted the number of black people there (17 out of 30,000...and that's counting Liz). Too many hilarious moments to recount or even begin to describe. All I have to say is "That's in tents!"
Oh, sophomore year. How so awesome? |
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(Slit My Wrist) |
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| 04:53pm 10/03/2009 |
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so, as i said in my last entry, i was bound to get sick. i was sick all last week with the flu. it was awful, and i had to miss work and take sick days which i did not want to do. blah.
but i rallied for the weekend. aka i rallied for brand new in new hampshire. word of advice: don't drive long distances while hopped up on cold meds. i spaced out and took a wrong exit and got us lost for a while. eventually made it to unh. the crowd was weird. a mix of brand new fans and unh students that just wanted to get drunk and start fights in the crowd. also, everywhere sarah and i went there were couples making out in front of us. i flipped off some couple and told them they were disgusting. they left soon after that. haha.
brand new was great, as always. it was interesting to hear the new stuff live for the first time. i was really happy that they played jesus. that song is so beautiful. the new song they played was really good as well. the next record should be awesome.
drove home in the pouring rain. it sucked. it was foggy too, so i could barely see anything. sarah was surprisingly calm throughout my drive of terror. thank god people aren't really on the road late at night...i definitely drifted across a few lanes more than once.
saw watchmen the other day with mikey. i really liked it, even though there was some pretty important stuff changed/left out. i think it worked well the way they did it. if they tried to do the vagina squid in the film, i don't think it would translate well. haha oh well.
back at work again. yesterday went by quickly at least. i am so tired and today has dragged on forever. thankfully, i get to leave in a few minutes. yay! |
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(Slit My Wrist) |
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| 01:35pm 02/03/2009 |
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taste of chaos was fun. the first few bands weren't really my thing, but it was still fun.
four year strong brought in the biggest crowd. people went nuts. there were cops and firefighters there doing crowd control....i mean, really?
sadly, when thursday came on like half of the crowd left. it was all the young kids that left. they weren't there for thursday at their best. thursday was so good. it was like being young again. i loved it. they announced at one point that they were doing full collapse front to back at the providence show. but i just found out that that show is cancelled. if was still on i'd probably try to go. full collapse is such a great album.
anyway. the rest of the weekend was pretty chill. i started feeling crappy yesterday, and it still hasn't let up today. at least we have a snow day so i don't have to take a sick day. hopefully, i'm not getting the flu. |
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(Slit My Wrist) |
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| 12:06pm 27/02/2009 |
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so, jimmy eat world was amazing. but it's not like you didn't already know that. clarity front to back. then a huge, ridiculous encore. i haven't been that happy in a long time.
tonight is taste of chaos with ali. worcester! it'll be like old times at the palladium listening to thursday. haha. i want to be 16 again. |
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(1Bled My Blood | Slit My Wrist) |
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| 09:20am 25/02/2009 |
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today: therapy. dinner at home in maynard.
thursday: jimmy eat world show at hob with mikey. possibly seeing some other friends there as well. should be pretty awesome.
friday: taste of chaos in worcester. reliving the old days with ali at the palladium. sleeping over in maynard. there's no way i'm driving back to somerville.
saturday: chill in the burbs. band practice? |
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(Slit My Wrist) |
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| 04:08pm 12/02/2009 |
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i don't feel like we're friends anymore. i have no idea who you are, and you obviously are making no attempt to know me.
i was always there for you through all of your shit. but the second i'm going through a life crisis, you're fucking gone.
why is everyone always so selfish? |
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(Slit My Wrist) |
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| a fun weekend... |
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| 11:09am 09/02/2009 |
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the past few days have been really great. thursday was paper and ridiculousness with matt and ann, which is always fun. they are my favorite people in the world. friday was awesome getting back in touch with old friends.
saturday brought band practice, though we were missing murray. he is currently sick and recovering. regardless, we had a great practice as a trio. then matt, ann and i went over to downtown concord and had a really nice dinner at helen's. i absolutely love helen's. it is so cute. it's like an old fashioned diner but without all of the filth. then, we all headed back to the apartment and i read some more of my amazing book. then, we called some people and found out there was a party at shannon's place. so we rounded up the troops and all carpooled over. the party definitely had a strange dynamic, and i didn't really know many people there. i ended up hanging out with mikey for most of the night. even though the vibe of the party was a bit awkward, people started up a pretty ridiculous round of karaoke. drunken karaoke. which i found hilarious because i did not have one drink that night.
yesterday was a fun day as well. had a hard time getting up...it sucked. got picked up by mikey and we headed out to townsend so he could take pictures at the grist mill. it was really warm out so i decided to wear flats...BAD IDEA! warm weather = melting snow = puddles and MUD EVERYWHERE! mikey had a fun time laughing at me after mud got inside my shoes and caked to the bottom of my feet. after the grist mill, we ended up driving around to random places and hanging out along 2A. got lunch, mikey made fun of me some more because i barely could finish half of my wrap...whatever. headed to lexington and got candy, mikey made fun of me even more for buying "old lady candy" (charleston chews are awesome, ok?). eventually got back home, where i found that matt and ann had abandoned our dinner plans. oh well, i hung out in the bathroom read my book while washing/soaking my muddy and cold feet. matt and ann got home later, and we all fell asleep while watching flight of the conchords. we are amazing.
now, i am at work and drinking a digusting mix of hot cocoa and black coffee. wonderful. |
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(Slit My Wrist) |
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| 08:45pm 07/02/2009 |
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"Who's the real sucker
When they create you and then hate you for surviving
No thanks to all the fair weather motherfuckers
Who thought that they could bury you with writing
Sign your life away, who cares?
And we'll be there to,
Pick you up when you come through
Because we care for you"
Superchunk - "June Showers" |
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(Slit My Wrist) |
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| 01:03pm 07/02/2009 |
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about to leave for band practice. quick update. therapy yesterday went really really well. i already feel like i'm making progress.
last night was pretty sweet. went out with ali, julie, and ali's friend caitlin. we went to a pub in hudson, had some drinks and chatted about our lives. caught up and what not. then we ended up going to a late movie at solomon. caitlin was making hilarious comments throughout, so that was pretty sweet. overall it was a really chill, fun night. hopefully, we can do something like that again soon.
oh, and ali is coming with me to taste of chaos! fuck yeah! it's like high school version 2.0. pumped! |
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(Slit My Wrist) |
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| 10:40am 06/02/2009 |
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went to paper last night. it was a lot of fun but kind of bizarre. i saw so many people that i knew from going to shows in worcester in high school...but it was awkward because we haven't really seen each other in like at least 4 years. lots of awkward hellos and small talk. overall it was a good night though.
getting up this morning was surprisingly easier than i thought it would be. apparently being out all night and barely sleeping suits me. i was also hyped up on caffeine at the time though, so that probably had some sort of effect.
therapy tonight. then hanging out with ali and julie. it should prove to be really fun. though i have no clue what i want to talk about in therapy...none at all. blah.
anyway.
is anyone going to taste of chaos on the 27th? i kind of want to go, but it'd be more fun if i didn't go alone. |
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(Slit My Wrist) |
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| 11:10am 04/02/2009 |
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i am currently drinking a small coffee with FIVE packets of sugar in it.
it is disgusting and amazing at the same time. |
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(Slit My Wrist) |
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| 08:10pm 02/02/2009 |
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visiting new york was really fun.
the best part by far was getting to see meghan after so long. i love her so much, and even though we may not see each other much our friendship is really easy going and fun and never awkward. we definitely have to keep in contact more...and plan more visits.
things are okay right now. better than last week at least. i feel pretty good about myself in general right now.
now, all i need is someone to share my good feelings with. |
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(Slit My Wrist) |
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